Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Family Day 2011

My Bike

An official Holiday meaning no work today. I'm not sure what the significance of the holiday is but I think they expect you to do something with those people that live in the room next to me. Yes yes, I guess we could play with them.


Sooooo incase you missed it - we have Three kids all Boys Teenagers Men bottomless pits that consume everything in sight. All three birthdays are coming up in March-ish putting them at 19, 18 and 14. It's great! Our kids dont do teletubbies or potty dance or pokemon or Yu-Gi-O anymore. They're on the other end of the specturm. They're more into the blow-someones-head-off-Call-of-Duty-Modern-Warfare type stuff. There is no more hiding of the soft-porn HBO shows like Rome and Spartacus. I'm sure they watch much worse lol.

The Enemy

We like our board games. Well I like them, as I never lose. Now that the kids are older, I can't mess about with strategy as much as I used to. I have to concentrate on winning. Kids get smarter as they get older. They also never forget that day they beat dad for the first time. It's one of those things that gets brought up every time we go to play. That's ok though. False confidence is to my advantage. I like to crush my opponents, not just beat them. I like to make them cry.

So today's challenge: Monopoly.

Of course I was the bicycle. I chose the dog for the wife but for some reason she objected.

My Riches

2 most important peices of the game. Instructions. Fuel.

We play specifically by the rules. So if you dont buy the property you land on, it gets auctioned. So that means starting the game is alot to do with the luck of the dice. You need to land on property!

Building my empire

Through my superior negotiating skills, I managed to pull off the first monopoly. I quickly upgraded. It paid for itself in no time. I was on the path to winning, except I keep forgetting that my oldest boy doesn't play to win. He regularly delibertately loses games in order for someone else to win other than me. Having said that, he made a few less than smart trades to sabatoge my advantage and in no time the tables were turned. The wife was ruthless! She cleaned out the kids, assimilating their wealth and properties. Soon I was at her mercy regularly taking expensive 5 nights stays at Illinois avenue. I think the key turning point was when I went to jail 4 times in a row and never passed GO.

Hotel California

The game was not unlike real life. First she took all my monies. Then she took all my properties. Then she had me on my knees squabling for scraps of food. Deja Vu.

Its getting Sporty, look at them properties!
WAIT!! What are those kids doing in that jail cell together?!

She cleaned me out. Much like real life.

Rubbing it in. Counting her bazillions.

Next Up: Scrabble
Game 2

Simple - if it's not in the dictionary then you lose your turn. If you challenge the word though and you are wrong, YOU lose your turn. Don't be wrong! :)

Immediately something was wrong. Our youngest has spent too much time reading and getting a edumacation of some sort because he was banging out some big point words and quickly took the lead by a huge margin. We need to stop sending him to school.

66 Points. GET SOME!

Of course, the wife makes up a word. I challenge her on it. She loses her turn. She then declares she's not gonna make dinner and I will not receive my daily feedings for the remainder of my life. Pfft.. she can't just play a game a lose nicely. It always has to be personal. This, after just raping me at monopoly. You would think she'd be grateful that I LET her win a game for a change.

It was a close game. Right up to the point where I FLEX'd my muscles and pulled out a 66 point word to take the game. Yeh thats right, I crushed those kids! Muahhahahahahha. Eat it. Thank you, come again.

Only yields 3 letter words though! lol



  1. Hey, I did 'tigers'.. SIX letters!!! LOL
    And I did Cowl.. Thank god it was a word because I wasn't sure. HEHEHEH Yes I am a dork when I comes to Scrabble but your butt got owned at Monopoly! XO

  2. HAHA! Loved the post. H and I love board games too. Another good one is called Ticket to Ride.

    Anyways, (minus the kids) sounded like you were recapping one of our games of monopoly. Someone always screws the other one and then gloats and then the loser gets pissed off. Great family fun.

    Also thought it was funny that your wife makes you get down on YOUR knees LOL!

    And the last pic of the mrs.... that was not concentration, that was scheming. I think she was plotting your demise buddy. Careful what you eat tonight!

    Do they have a canadian currency monopoly? Because buying Oriental Ave for $100 US is NOT equal to Canadian. Just saying.

  3. Nobody's kids play teletubbies or pokeman anymore, your old!
    You really should play Monopoly with Freddie. We call him the "rule natzi". He is the only person I have ever played with that pulls the rules out every two seconds. I guess you two have a few more things in common.

  4. Dude, I loved that post. And kudo's to the family for enduring your pictures. The kids looked thrilled about participating , pffft kidz. Your wife is a true partner, congrats.

  5. Hey Matty

    Here's a newsflash. You're right that Oriental Ave is NOT worth $100 Canadian. Rather its more like $97 Canadian because the $US is worth less than the Canadian dollar. ha ha ha ha



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